directions from my dreams

You're Beautiful MVs

2009-12-13T22:49:00.009+08:00

Okay, I admit - I am hopelessly in love with the Korean drama You're Beautiful.

That's why I'm delicating this whole post to show the songs in the drama, a thing that I have never done before.

是真的真的很喜欢这部戏。我觉得里面演员的演技都超厉害的。再加上，主角们的歌唱底子都不错。剧中很多首歌由他们唱起来，竟觉得他们真的像一个现实生活中的乐队。原因应该也是因为，剧中的两个主角(Jeremy - 李鸿基饰演 and Kang Shin Woo/姜新宇 - 郑龙华饰演)是现实生活中真正的乐队的一分子。值得注意的是，剧中的男主角(Hyung Tae Kyung/黄泰京 - 张根锡饰演)和女主角(Go Mi Nam/高美男 - 朴信惠饰演)却不是歌手，而是演员而已。而他们两人还挑起大梁，演出剧中乐队A. N. Jell 的两个主唱！最神奇的是，他们唱得真的很好！跟专业歌手相比，有过之而无不及！

这是一部绝对不能错过的——偶像剧。不只是因为剧中的主角、配角长得高、长得帅，而是因为剧情真的很引人入胜。或许你会说，偶像剧嘛，再怎么样都是一千零一种题材，注重点就是在煽情的剧本（俗称的洒狗血）。

可是这部戏真的很不同。换句话说，编剧在剧中洒狗血洒得非常高明、非常精致、非常新颖。=）
接下来的一连串MVs，请大家好好享受吧！相信看完了所有的MV后，大家也应该明白戏里在做什么了。

Promise/约定 - A. N. Jell

The theme song of the show. 哎呀，现在光听就觉得好兴奋了，好像再冲动地把整部戏重看一次——即使我已经这么做三次了。

As Ever/依然 - A. N. Jell

这首歌有两个不同版本，在这里都放上了！这个版本是由剧中的乐队 A. N. Jell演绎的，私心觉得这个版本是比较好的 =)

As Ever/依然 - Lee Hong Ki

剧中鼓手Jeremy演唱的版本，很喜欢他的声音，有一种干净的感觉。剧中的他是个很可爱的人物！也是我第一眼就觉得最喜欢的人物。大姐说他在剧中的演技其实满夸张的，可是我就是喜欢呀，喜欢是没有道理的 =）

My Heart Is Cursing/心在谩骂 - Kim Dong Wook

剧中经常听到的插曲，听着听着也会觉得很悲伤。

Without Words/默默无语 - 9th Street

这首歌！绝对是最多版本的一首，也是剧中最爱播放的歌曲之一，不管是很感动的画面或很悲伤的画面，这首歌一定会被作为剧中的背景音乐播出。剧中，这首歌是由A. N. Jell 乐队队长黄泰京为高美男制作的单曲，结果演变成美男对泰京感情的爆发曲。

Without Words/默默无语 - Park Shin Hye

感情爆发曲！就是这首！私底下我也最喜欢这个版本，觉得女主角的歌声很有爆发力。《优一周》专辑点评也评论过这首歌，说这首歌的歌词十分配主角的心声，这点我也很同意。

Without Words/默默无语 - Jang Geun Suk

男主角演绎的版本，歌声还是很动人，只是我总觉得有些地方怪怪的，好像比较没有那种爆发力的感觉。

Down From Heaven/从天而降 (With Oh WonBin) - Miss $

轻快歌曲！这个MV里说的是Jeremy和高美男的，呃，短短的，还不算爱情的爱情故事。基本上就是落花有意，流水无情。谁是落花，谁是流水，这个... ... 就让你们自己去看了。

Lovely Day - Park Shin Hye

很甜蜜的歌！但稍微，有一点过甜了，听就了还满腻的。

A Song For The Fool/因为我是傻瓜 - Park Sang Woo

这首歌听似轻快，但只要看过剧情的人在听到这首歌时都很想哭。因为这首歌，是剧中永远的温柔好男人男配角对女主角的肺腑之言。看了这个后，有一度我非常非常的讨厌高美男，为什么要让姜新宇那么难受呢，为什么喜欢的人不是那个一直注视着她，在暗中默默帮助她的——男配角呢？

Goodbye - Jang Geun Suk

这首歌，悲得可以。不同的是，这首歌是男主角的心声，会什么会这样呢，就等你们自己去看了！

What Should I Do/如何是好 Compliation - Jang Geun Suk & Park Shin Hye

同上一个MV一样。然而，这首歌牵扯到的还有男女主角父母亲之间的恩怨。这个版本还不是原唱版本，因为找不到好看的原唱版本的MV，就把男女主角的版本现放上来了。

What Should I Do/如何是好 - Park Da Ye

原唱版本登场！

哦！终于弄完了！大家慢用！再见！

猫咪，你在等谁？

2009-12-11T20:38:00.005+08:00

最近到SPH做实习生。

老实说，真得好累哦。可能是因为被分配到采访组的缘故吧，我几乎是每天都要往外跑，要不然就是做电话访问，等各公司公关回信。起初的一个礼拜，真的是茫然的，做每件事都忐忑不安，不知道是对还是错。偏偏我又坐在早报热线电话旁边，结果每次一有人来店我都吓了一跳。现在是实习的第二个礼拜了，情况好像比较好了点，比较不满意的就是不固定的工作时间。他们那边叫做灵活性的工作时间，对我而言却是苦差。

因为，那意味着我从早上八点到晚上十点都有可能需要工作。

幸好只是实习生，还没有那么重大的担子。
现在，我平均的工作时间都是早上十点到晚上七、八点。

晚上回家的时候，总会看到一只望穿秋水不知道等待着什么的猫咪。

其实这只猫咪是住在附近组屋的邻居家的猫。大概是从中三那年起吧，我回家的时候就会从巴士站穿越一座座的组屋走廊走回家。那时候就认识了这只橙白色毛发的猫。每次回家的时候都大概是下午四五点左右，那只猫就会躲在组屋走廊晒太阳、做日光浴。起初几次，那只猫对我还挺有警觉性的，每次已走过它的身旁它就会马上站起来，谨慎、防备的看着我走过。后来，日子久了，它大概是熟悉我的味道吧，也懒得理我了，有时还会在我走过是对我“瞄瞄”两声，意思意思打个招呼。

前些日子，我还看到它跟另一只黑猫走得很近呢，大概是在谈恋爱吧？那只黑猫看上去挺凶的。我想，如果是人的话，那只黑猫应该是属于那种黑帮大哥型的人。不过，所谓铁汉柔情嘛，啊不对不对，在这里应该是铁“猫”柔情，那只黑猫看上去倒挺照顾我邻居的猫似的。看它们两只在一起蛮可爱的，我都好像唱一首“两只老虎”，哦，又不对了，是“两只猫咪”送给它们了。

可是最近，我七八点多回家时，总会看到我邻居的猫咪一只猫孤零零的卷缩在我家组屋楼下。那只黑猫不知道跑哪里去了，都没有陪伴在我领居的猫身旁。看着那只猫咪趴在墙壁旁，时不时抬头仰望等猫的样子真得挺令人感到心酸。

唉，希望那只黑猫不会像老虎伍兹一样是只花心的猫。希望我邻居的猫早点找到一个真心疼它、爱它的猫吧，它真的是一只很可爱的猫呢。

容易高兴容易伤心

2009-12-06T11:36:00.006+08:00

我发现 —— 我很容易高兴。而且我也很容易伤心。
通常只要一点小事就能激发出我一堆的思考。
这到底是好事，还是坏事？

唉，一个CCM的人怎么能够怎么容易随心起动呢？不行，我一定要保持形象，尽管已经有很多人说，我的形象早在不知几时就荡然无存了。

但是——

人因梦想而伟大。所以，我也要为我的保持形象的梦想而伟大！

因此——

噔噔噔噔！

哇哈哈哈！我太为我自己感到骄傲了！我写的稿被打印了，出版在今天《联合早报》的第十版上！虽然被改了好多，但是，那仍是我的稿啊呀呀呀！

哈哈哈哈！我克制不住想仰天狂笑的欲望！虽然抬头是一片有些掉漆的天花板，但我也一样可以笑下去！

你们看到了吗，看到了吗？快去买报纸，快去读吧！

耶耶耶耶！啦啦啦啦！噢噢噢噢！

2009年12月6日
林欣萤独家报道

PS. 最近也疯狂迷上一部韩剧 —— 《是美男啊》（You're beautiful）。

真的真的很好看! 我看的时候不是因为狂笑而流泪就是因为感动而心痛！从这边看，四个男女主角好像都长得一般般，但看久了就真的会看得出他们的帅或美了。那那那，这里我把网络链接给弄上了——

华文字幕版：

《是美男啊》

英文字幕版：

You're Beautiful

任君挑选！

“人来疯”内心剖解

2009-11-18T07:44:00.003+08:00

我发现自己跟世界脱节。周遭的人都在忙些什么，我全无头绪。这种感觉，挺悲凉的。

好吧，我承认，我在闹孤僻、耍自卑。

一直以来都不怎么乐意把情绪放在这个网上日记，不是不乐意分享，而是觉得自己生活沉闷，没什么好写的。况且，就算要写些什么，也需要有那种想写的欲望，而这种欲望往往只会在我觉得感动/快乐/难过/情绪有所波动时才会涌现。然而，又因为我是个健忘、“人来疯”的人，一旦度过这种情绪波动后，我又懒得下笔了。毕竟，那些瞬间一闪而逝的感动/感伤，对我而言是极其难以扑捉的，要怎样才能完完全全地把自己的所思所想记录下来呢？

很难，对我而言很难，所以到最后，往往都是懒得下笔了，就空着吧。

糟糕，我走题了。

早晨八点，独自一人在语特课室令人有一种与世隔绝的感觉。我也不知道为什么会这么想。是因为这里的安宁吧！所以感触才特别的多。

猛然间，回头看个个同窗好友，才发现自己的生活似乎过得很颓废。每人都各自有自己的世界，但我呢？是性格中带有的那种、对任何事物都很少感兴趣的冷感让我变成这样的吗？因为我实在搞不清初，到底有什么值得他们那么狂热的，值得他们的心情如此绚烂，如此多姿多彩。是无意中遇到的任何事情就拿起显微镜，加以放大后在以自己的喜怒哀乐作为点缀，才会过得如此华丽？还是我自己这种总喜欢把大事化小、小事化无的性格让我无从去体验生活中的情绪？

之于我而言，人生好比一团烂泥，在烂泥中，还能找到什么能够勾引起我们兴趣的事吗？

我不知道，真的不知道。

毕竟，我连我自己想要什么样的生活都不清楚了。是渴望那种每天都有着不一样的心情写照、那种会大笑大哭的生活吗？还是那种忙碌到自己都不知道在做什么，然后每天晚上入睡时才欣慰地想，“今天又是一个充实的一天”的生活吗？还是像现在这样，能够空出一大堆时间发呆反思，几乎是“清心寡欲”的生活呢？

我不清楚。前两个选项的生活，似乎过得太大起大落了，套句佳俐以前在作文写过、令我深深震撼的话：“过度的兴奋也会使人感到疲惫。”然而，最后一样的生活选项，又似乎太过沉闷了些，可我对这种生活又会比较偏爱，因为这种生活虽是我无法感受过多的情绪，可相对的，我所会受到的伤害，也会来得少。什么样的伤害，抱歉，这里我无法解释，这只能由个人去体会了。

能够有耐性读到这里的人，其实应该会发现我性格中的缺陷——太过敏感、而且总是在自怜自哀。否则，又怎会有这篇心情日记的出现？毕竟这种烦恼之于别人而言是多么的微不足道。举个典型的例子吧，这就好像当你埋怨着口中的食物不够美味时，非洲的儿童们连一口食物都没办法吃到一样。讲到这里，我又有些不满了——对说出这种“典型”现象的人的不满。总觉得这种人应该是不了解“家家有本难念经”的意思吧？诚然，非洲的儿童们确实可怜，但也不应该否定掉这些所谓“微不足道”的人的烦恼呀！站在不同社会阶级的我们总会有不同的烦恼，又怎能拿来相比呢？为什么总要有这种“身在福中不知福”的感慨？为什么认为这些人都是在无病呻吟呢？

好吧，我承认，我又走题了。

算了吧。反正写来写去，也不知道自己到底在写什么，更何况，写下烦恼又不能实际上的解决它们，只会让别人觉得你更可悲而已，连这种事情都要烦恼。

两天前才对梦飞说，为人处事应圆滑，诚实、耿直固然好，但，也要看场所，最好应是向往“八面玲珑”的处世之道。当日情况历历在目，怎么反而是我先自己钻牛角尖，没办法在思考事物时“八面玲珑”呢？

我想，这应该又是我性格中的缺陷吧！

今天这篇日记，也许是我难得昙花一现的真正内心剖白，下次还会不会有这样的机会，哪，就要视情况而定了。（不清楚为什么我会这么说的人，请注意一下那个被Bold的字眼吧！）

PW'S OVER

2009-11-14T13:07:00.003+08:00

PW'S OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG, THAT SUCKY, IRRITATING, HORRENDOUS, STUPID, IDOITIC, SPASTIC, RETARDED THING IS FINALLY OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DON'T NEED TO MEMORISE MY SCRIPT NOW.

NO I&R. NO OP. NO EOM. NO GPP. NO PI.
NO FARE. NO A&E. NO GI.

I DON'T NEED TO GET PARANOID WHEN I SEE YH PLAYING DOTA/WARCRAFT/PVZ/WHATEVER OTHER GAME(S).

I DON'T NEED TO ENDURE YC'S SINGING WHEN TRYING TO TYPE OUT MY SCRIPT.

I DON'T NEED TO WORRY ABOUT WHETHER MY VOICE WILL BREAK OR NOT WHEN I'M PRESENTING.

I DON'T NEED TO WORRY IF MY BODY JERKS DURING OP.

Okay.

Let's cool down from the excitement of being released from the torturing PW.

Owww. This is impossible.

我现在连做梦都会笑。

叫我冷静？

没门。

我的喜悦，已经无法用言语诠释了。
就像梦飞说的，现在的天气是万里无云的，下过雨后还会有彩虹向你微笑呢。

“至若春和景明，波澜不惊，上下天光，一碧万顷；沙鸥翔集，锦鳞游泳；岸芷汀兰，郁郁青青。而或长烟一空，皓月千里，浮光跃金，静影沉璧，渔歌互答，此乐何极！登斯楼也，则有心旷神怡，宠辱偕忘，把酒临风，其喜洋洋者矣。 ”

——范仲淹《岳阳楼记》

先借用一下古贤人的篇章看来形容现在在我眼里我所看到的一切事物吧！
（看到那个Bold的字吗？看到了吗？哇哈哈哈哈！）

乐疯了。

记者日记

2009-11-07T12:50:00.006+08:00

忽然想起那时候班上有些人想说要借他们看的那篇文章，就在此打了放上网，献丑了！CLL Blog 也有上载。

提示：《最宝贵的》、《药》有一个共同点，就是“拯救”，是以“拯救”为主题（不是“题目”），题目自拟，文体不限（小说、散文、诗歌均可），写一篇文章，内容要联系到上两篇文章。

记者日记

2006 年5月13日天气晴

今天算是个有纪念价值的日子。今天，是我正式踏入记者这个行业的第一天。怀着兴奋又有些胆怯的心情，我来到了那个极具时代感的大厦——“诚信报业控股”总部门。一踏入公司门口，那个热情的编辑助理美铃姐便带着我逛过公司的每个部门。我认识了风趣幽默的摄影师阿肯，外表打扮得光鲜亮丽的资深记者爱丽姐，绑着一条辫子，老是蹦蹦跳跳，像个长不大的女孩的绘图师晓兰姐以及许许多多其他有趣的同事们。

看着这群友善又热情的同事们，我那有些忐忑不安的心，也终于安顿下来。坐在属于我的座位时，我的心情是飞扬的、雀跃的、迫不及待的。未来光明的前景似乎就在我面前展开。

就让我怀着跃跃欲试的心来面对我接下来的挑战吧！

***

天气，炎热得有些过分。

她坐在爱丽姐的身边，手中捧着一本笔记本，聆听着在众人前的法僧念着超度亡灵的地藏经。

太过炎热的天气，搭配着白色的帐篷，竟也成了一种诡异的调和。白色帐篷下，除了喃喃的念经声，仔细一听，轻轻的抽泣声也逐渐响起。这声音，听在耳里，令人也不禁感到悲伤。瞬间，帐篷下浓郁的悲伤气氛仿佛无限扩大，令人窒息。

她不由得轻叹了一口气。世上的悲剧怎么如此之多？今天，是前两天跳下地铁轨道寻死的男子的丧礼。据说，男子是因为被债务逼疯了，才做出这么疯狂的事情。这件事，在国内掀起了轩然大波，引起了许多人的注意，纷纷热心地捐款救济那死者的遗孀，帮助那可怜的一家子解决庞大的债务。今天，她和爱丽姐被委任来此采访死者的亲属，希望能了解到目前为止所筹得善款够不够救济这惹人同情的一家人，他们还需不需要更庞大的资金来带他们走出困境。想到这里，她嘴角也轻轻上扬了起来——人间处处有温情，这句话，果然不假！

“笑什么？人家法僧在超度亡灵，你还在这边偷笑，很不敬哦！”爱丽姐眼尖地发现了她的笑容，轻拍她的大腿示意她收起笑容。

“没什么，只是觉得，这个社会也是挺温暖的。。。。。。”

等到了超度仪式完结，爱丽姐和她便打起了精神，走向那前排坐着的死者的家属。走到一半，她却突然感到肠胃一阵不舒服，有些抱歉地向爱丽姐解释后，便匆匆忙忙的跑向离白色大棚不远处的厕所。真是糗大了，怎么就偏偏挑在她要准备进行采访时才闹肚子呢？

“唉，你怎么把我拖到这里来了！不是才要接受采访吗？”

听到“采访”两个字，她的注意力马上被吸引去。开口说话的人，是个男人的声音。

“叫你出来你就出来，有什么好反抗的？”这词，开口说话的人的声音尖锐得有些刺耳，不难猜出是个女人的声音。

“那，有什么事，回去再说不能吗？真是的。”又是之前那个男人的声音，语气中的不耐显而易见。

“我跟你说，听说今天那几位来自报馆的记者是来问上次所筹的款数够不够的！”女音当中带着兴奋，似乎无法掩盖。“现在，我们有得赚了！”

“你。。。你又在打什么主意了？”

“啧，说得我多坏似的！”那道女音的主人不满啐了男人一口。“我只是在为我们家着想啊！而且，真要说什么，也只能算是你那个短命的弟弟欠我们的！记不记得，他不时向你借钱吗？这件事，当时差点把我给气死了。又不是不知道你那弟弟没出息，说要搞什么生意，结果咧？生意没做成，倒是欠下一屁股债务丢给我们扛！”

“喂你够了没？人都死了还说得那么难听，他好歹是我弟弟！”

“我说错了吗？你看，实施不久摆在眼前吗？没办法还清债务，他倒好，就跳下地铁轨道，两腿一身，眼一闭，就全都不干他的事了呀！苦的是谁？不就是我们这些帮他还债的人！也幸好他的死竟然引来报馆的人来采访，才会有机会帮我们筹款。所以，现在我们开口要多一点钱也不为过啊！要不然这么好赚钱的机会你要上哪里找啊？”

“但。。。公众捐款是给弟妹筹钱呀！这样做，会不会太过分了？”男人的声音里，有些举棋不定。

那女人冷冷一笑，又继续说：“拜托，你弟弟死了之后，你想你那个无依无靠的弟妹和她的三个孩子会搬到哪里住？自然是来投靠我们啦！所以，你就不必介意了，就当是他们一家给的租房钱不就好了？所以，等一下那些记者问你时，你记得要这样说。。。。。。”

随着厕所外的那对男女离去，他们的声音也越来越模糊不清。她站在洗手盆前，呆呆地看着镜中倒影，有些无法接受刚听到的那些残忍的、无情的、自私的算计。

一直到爱丽姐结束了采访，找到了她，正担心的慰问她到底发生了什么事时，她才发现自己竟然待在厕所将近一小时。

回到了帐篷内，她看见了那个依然在细细哭泣的可怜寡妇，以及在旁轻拍着她肩膀，那一对据说是死者的哥哥和嫂嫂的男女。

似乎是感受到了她的注视，死者的嫂嫂抬起了头，还友善地对她笑了一笑。

骤然，胃里一阵翻腾。她无法阻止自己，当场就吐了出来，脑海中不停地重播着厕所内听到的对话，以及那位妇女的微笑。。。。。。

***

“。。。所以，当时的情况是那辆黑色的轿车撞上了大卡车，然后车主和大卡车的司机便下来，双方起了争执是吗？”

抱着孩子的妇人不耐烦的挥挥手，似乎希望她能赶快离开。

“是啦、是啦！我也不是很清楚，反正他们一下车就开打了嘛！简直吵死人了！”

忙碌的记录笔记的手停下，她愣了一愣，抬起头来，看着那位妇女。妇女被她瞧得有些不自在，不禁放轻了语气，问道：“还有什么我帮得上的么？”

“当时，是您拨打电话求救的吗？”

“我。。。。。。”妇女的脸上，染上了一抹明显的愧色。

“当时，我抱着我儿子。又没带手机，多不方便啊！而且，别人也没有打电话啊，最后是个小伙子，打了电话给救护车就好像有急事似的走了。。。。。。”

答非所问。多余的解释，更像企图为自己脱罪。但，那位妇女又何罪之有？只是冷眼旁观而已呀。

她微笑，谢过了妇女后便结束采访。至今已是她成为记者的第三个年头了，她早已从当初那个跟在爱丽姐身旁的小助理晋升到可以独当一面的记者了。离那次男子跳轨事件也已经有两年多了。

今天，公司派她来采访的事件，是关于一起因车祸而延伸出的争执。本来一件轻而易举便能解决的事，却因为双方都不肯退步而酿成了悲剧——卡车司机与轿车车主竟因一言不合，便开始打了起来。后来，不知是谁突然拿出了一把刀，开始砍向对方。在争执中，有一人被砍成重伤，性命垂危。

闭上眼，深呼吸了一口，她谢过了在场让她进行采访工作的警长，转身离开。一路上，还看见有些人竟探头探脑的，企图抄下闯祸司机的车牌号码，手中还拿着马票纸呢。

叹了一口气，她强迫自己不要去质疑这一切，强迫自己把妇女不耐的眼神，嘴里把一起伤人见血时间以“吵死人了”来形容时的表情给忘掉，也强迫自己，忘记对这个世界的失望。。。。。。

***

2009年7月14日天气晴

爱丽姐建议我应该放一次长假。

我不知道该不该照着她的话去做。

在记者这个行业做了三年，我也挺累的。除了因工作上的繁忙，累的，也是我的心。

三年以来的确让我长了不少见识。记者这个行业，让我接触，让我看到了许多人性的面貌。

原来一个人可以在平静的外表下藏着那么多心思。就像当初那个把自私的计划设计得天衣无缝、算盘打得响亮的“嫂嫂”，竟然还能朝我笑得友善一样。那是我第一次出师采访，想不到就让我获取了这么“宝贵”的经验。

直到最近的车祸事件，我也从当初那个坚信“人间有情”的傻女孩成了一个能对这种事情习以为常的人了。

是不是应该怪自己把人性想得太美好了呢？是不是应该怪自己对人们的期许过高？是不是，自私、无情、残忍、不耐、迷信。。。。。。这些种种的情绪都是人性中无法拔出的劣根性呢？

我，差一点就要摒弃了从小到大，坚持“人性本善”的真理了。

这世界，需要有变化，需要有什么力量，狠狠敲醒人们的脑袋，让他们不在时刻地算计别人，恢复人性中的热诚、真实、自然。要不，恐怕在全球暖化将地球毁灭前，人类将先毁灭自己。

或许，真的是时候给自己放个长假了。。。。。。

咬牙切齿

2009-11-06T21:43:00.004+08:00

Yesterday I was seriously on an emotion roller-coaster.

In the morning I was thinking about H3 CLL. That got me off on a really really bad mood.
Then I remain "neutral" for a while.
Something upset me in the afternoon again, but after lunch I felt a lot better. I guess food therapy works on me.

在emo的时候，有个挺突兀的情况发生。我拿起我的稿纸，在胡乱写、发泄我的情绪的时候，班上的一群男同学就走进了语特课室，准备开始他们的"makeshift LAN" 厮杀。然后，Preston 看到我在写东西，以为我再做GSC功课，很有义气地帮我加油打气。我顿时就有些傻眼，本来想要解释的，可是看他那么诚恳的样子，又有些于心不忍，不忍告诉他，其实，我不是在用功读书，而是在努力发泄，他的加油，用得有些。。。。。。呃，不恰当。

不过我是真的很感谢他的加油啦，虽然用得不太适当，但是相比其他男生之下，他真的很细心，也很关心同学：）谢谢你，你的加油，我心领了。：）

Sigh.

Today was just equally as bad. I woke up feeling super terrible. My nose's blocked, and I started coughing like hell. Sorry pw mates, but I think I might have caught a cold, right before OP. Let's hope that I get well soon.

I went to school all the way thinking that I could submit my GSC compo. Then when I reached school, I realised that I didn't bring the compo at all. Plus I also left the library books I want to return at home.

It's super bad right?

I refuse to admit it's my fault. Really, why should it be my fault, when the shoe cabinet looked so eager for me to put my file and books on when I was wearing my shoes.

It's the shoe cabinet's fault. :(
Similarly, it's the toilet bowl's fault when I dropped my sony ericsson k610i into it.
And it's also the lift crack's fault when I dropped my sony ericsson k660i into it.

Really, what can a person do when the lift crack and the toilet bowl calls out for your phone?
You can only let them be.

Sigh.

今天去学校根本就是去当花瓶的。
噢，不对，我没有当花瓶。我在学校还吃了菜贩，玩了Icy Towers，睡了一觉。
更正：今天去学校根本就是去当猪，然后体验醉生梦死的生活的。
再然后，就是听到某个消息然后被气倒的。
我现在真的很想很想，向申易借几把锋利的刀。
用来做什么呢？

恕本小姐心情不好，请自行猜测。

唉。糟糕的一天。

Ah-ha, I managed to do some links. Too tired for today already, shall consider linking next time...

诡异的灾害

2009-10-30T05:11:00.002+08:00

华中校舍之三大威胁：

一、以不同瓦片铺成的地面。
人生的道路便是由华中的地面而能了解，它的凹凸不平，曲折难解，令人感触颇深，人生的道路，莫过于如此？在雨后的清新中，则成了了积水的收藏地。然，华中无处不见的它，每时、每分、每秒都让人有深刻体悟人生的感叹，没有任何障碍物，一路直通到底，脚下踩着的地板忽高忽低，凹凸有致，只要没有注意，就会因失神而与地面来个卿卿我我，缠绵悱恻呀！

二、一柱柱高耸的墙壁、柱子。
人性中所要求的品质，莫过于这些墙柱所表达的意喻：坚定不移、威武不屈。尽管被漆上不同的颜色，但它们和谐共处，默默为数千个莘莘学子撑起一片天。不同肤色，仍能合作无间，更表现的新加坡多年以来的期待：种族和谐，可敬、可赞呀！然，其坚定的个性却略显不够柔软，每每忘情的不意一撞，脑部剧疼，实在是令人难以忘怀，感叹滋味无穷啊！

三、各个厕所里的马桶。
圆滑亮丽，洁白光滑的外表下，却有着令人难以超越的广大胸襟，“宰相肚里能撑船”，实测应改成“马桶肚里能容量”。其为人类所做出的功效，伟大无比，有了它，人们莫不感到欣慰，使用它，测通体舒畅。然，其狡诈之处在于它的广大容量，举凡是什么都能掉入其中，更是谋杀多个无辜手机的无形杀手，怎不让人扼腕其邪恶的企图！

看似平凡，实测暗藏杀机，华中处处，莫不叫人感慨人世的阴险呀！

after promos...

2009-10-12T18:18:00.005+08:00

Promos 完了。
我也完了。

这次的升学考我是彻彻底底的完了。不懂为什么，没有办法转下心来读，更糟糕的是身体的不适，让我几乎是天天昏昏欲睡。结果我几乎没有读到什么。

这次的升学考真的是去“玩”的。虽然很不应该，但考都考了，会得到什么样的烂成绩自己心里也有数。也就让这次考试当成一个鉴定吧！看看我真的没有读书时（或者说最接近真的没有读书的状态时）自己的脑袋装了什么，考试成绩会拿多少。

这种心态真的要不得。我看我就终其一生只会有这么一次关于“考试”时的反叛行为，再这样下去兴许我的前途还没被我玩完前，我就被自己的愧疚心给折磨至死了。

考试过后的日子，我迎来了一半糜烂的生活。说“一半”是有原因的，因为我是真的没有完全颓废。我还是有再看一些课外习题的，虽然通常都是在家里没有人的时候看，所以没人知道。因为我发现我不能真的陷入颓废状态，要不然我肯定会比这次的考试死得更惨。

关于糜烂生活的定义，主要则是在“吃、上网、睡”这个循环中度过。我发现有时我还真像一只猪耶，胃口真的可涨可缩，有时候我还真可以在吃完了午餐后就马上就吃下一份算挺大的下午茶餐点。而且，因为吃的都是很贵的食物（但是超好吃的），我的荷包也正在迅速减肥中。希望我的身材绝对不要和我现在的钱包的状态成反比，呜，我真的需要忏悔了，不过在忏悔之前——先介绍几道我在吃过了之后就一直一直垂涎的食物。

Imperial Treasure 拉面小笼包，位于Marina Square Level One。（原谅我懒得去查它的华文名字）
下面就是小笼包的照片。（超好吃的，汤多，肉鲜，味美——哈哈，我在打广告，没错）

它的上海锅贴饺子也是很好的，而最得我心的是它的清炖鸡汤，汤清少油，真的非常好喝，不过价格也很贵，一碗满小碗的汤就已经八块钱，加上GST 。。。

破费可想而知。但是为了食物，绝对值！（这纯属个人意见啦。。。）

Oh yah, my sis and I ran into Qiu Han and Guang Yi today after our, er, extravagant spendings on food today (as for what food, refer above, both of us ate all three dishes right after our lunch, thanks to our expandable stomachs).

正靠在地铁车站的座椅上呈现半撑死的状态时，眼前闪过两个很眼熟的人影。秋寒打扮得很成熟，很美哦，跟在学校很不一样（也对啦，学校来来去去也都只是穿校服、体育服而已），所以我几乎认不出来。

小俩口在甜蜜约会=）

然后，我就很自卑的发现，我的穿着品味跟秋寒相比，真的是"kiddo and adult"的差别。人家穿得斯斯文文的，连身长裙，我咧？

3-quarter pants plus a 随便套上的 t-shirt (rather crumpled too, but no one realise because I was wearing my cardigan). Somemore I was burping (because I ate too much) and sitting in a quite unglam way because my stomach was too full and I couldn't care less about my image at that time.

真是淑女与流氓的差别。

结果只好很阿Q精神的自我安慰，“女为悦己者而容嘛”，她穿得好看也是应该的。。。

what the heck is happening to me?

2009-09-26T03:12:00.002+08:00

I seriously wonder if this is a season of bad luck for me.

Fainting first, folllowed by vomiting. And I also don't understand why I am here in the morning at 3+ am.

Are these kinds of torments never going to end for me?

Urgh. And it has to be before promos, the "狂风正吹起"的时段.

How how how???

Urgh...

Is it interesting that I have to find Methotrexate in the bio notes I am studying now too?(Control of eukaryotic gene expression, pg 8)

just sick?!

2009-09-19T13:54:00.002+08:00

I don't like the effects of Methotrixate.
But I have to take it.
Or I may have to pay the price of my eyes for it.
...................................................................................................................................................................
This is seriously disturbing. I think my body is getting a little bit too weak now. Not that I was ever the healthy baby from the start.
Anyway, good thing is, my limbs which have been rather numb since thursday is finally getting a bit better. Bad news is, I'm developing a rather bad sore throat.
Whatever medicine the doctor gave me for my sore throat, I am quite positive that it's not working. Or not working in the correct way, at least. I mean, the usual side effects of feeling drowsy, tired, those are still there, but talk about curing the sore throat...

Oh wells. What can I say?

to go or not to go?

2009-09-11T00:29:00.002+08:00

现实与理想的挣扎。究竟，谁胜谁败？孰重孰轻？
剪不断，理还乱，这句话竟然讽刺性的成为我现在最大的烦恼。
剪不断的，是对理想的渴望；理不清的，是对现实的残酷。
想来想去，到最后是越想越乱。
到底该怎么办？
站在对自己前途而言，我是该欣然赴这场盛宴的，但我还是太怯懦了，一直都不敢踏出第一步。
到最后，或许大哭一场会比较有效吧？但是哭，又能怎样？这也是我问自己好几遍的问题。于是乎，我们又回到了原点。
真的好烦，脑袋里乱哄哄的，该做的、不该做的都搅和在一起，把原本的次序一一颠覆。
—————————————————————————————————————————————————
道德和利益之间的拉锯战从未在我脑海中停下过。真的，我发现我变得好多，但不知道是不是变好还是变坏。道德的界限随着年龄增长越见模糊，我也无力挽回那条虚拟的线。只能时时提醒自己，这样做对吗？

唉，头又在疼了。想得太多，果然是件坏事。

pasta anyone?

2009-08-30T23:34:00.002+08:00

Don't ever believe it when youe eldest sister tells you that she wants to make pastea for you.

It will end up you making pasta for her.

Or rather, I think it's half-half. She will put in too much water, saw the bubbles you get when boiling water, exclaim in shock and turn off the gas tap. Then you will have to turn on the gas tap again, and wait for the water to boil again.

Sometimes I wished I could be a real youngest sibling. The kind who won't have to wake up ealier to wake her elder siblings up for appointments/school, the kind who don't have to cook lunch for their elder siblings, the kind that don't have to stay up late at night to open doors for their elder siblings.

Sadly, those days might never come.

The themem of reversal is always apparent in my family, especially within the three of us.

Why is it that the youngest sibling have to look after her two elder sisters?

无解。这是我唯一能想得到的回答。
。。。
。。。
。。。

*唉，梁钰珩，你就必须要这样伤了我的心你才甘愿吗？
本小姐对你死心塌地、一心一意，为了能挽回你的心，不惜作出赔本的买卖，你还不肯接受？
啊！
我的心碎了一地，那悲憾的声音，你听见了没？
那是我对你的真心呀！
难道因为我们分隔了两地，你就不在乎我了吗？
竟然。。。不肯听我念唐诗给你听！
。。。
。。。
。。。
重色轻友的家伙！凭什么说***有资格自恋，那我没有吗？GRR...*

以上从*到*里的对话，纯属本人对某个跟我家打对台的人的某位重色轻有的人的对话，大家看不懂也没关系，哈哈！

保持缄默。惟有如此，才能维持和平假象，不让事情搞得更糟糕。这样做，应该是对的吧?
眼观鼻，鼻观心，我除了忍，还能怎样呢？

忍字头上一把刀，那把刀悬了好久好久，快砍中了她疲惫不已的心了。

-于晴《闲云公子》

confessions to make

2009-08-19T18:48:00.002+08:00

Confessions to make:

Sorry to the group of girls whom I borrowed the computer today to send my email for being really insensitive today. I apologise for not thanking you after I used the computer but instead, just stomped off angrily because of family matters.

Sorry to my PW group members if I seemed pissed and stressed and 欠扁 today. I apologise for my inefficiency in doing PW work and I really really promise to do all PW stuff really quickly and nicely by putting in my 100 x 100% effort.

Sorry to FA-MAR-LY for being so angry and frustrated and having mood-swings all the day. I apologise for murdering you all with my horrendous singing.

Sorry to all the teachers who will be teaching me tomorrow and friday. I apologise for my incompetency in completeting all my homework. Especially for Chem which I am still at Kinetics tutorial and my tutor is already going two more topics ahead.

And finally sorry to my dear dear family who have been withstanding my mood-swings and sudden bursts of anger and my laziness and everything. I apologise for all those things I've done to you all.

eom madness?

2009-08-14T05:27:00.002+08:00

Enough is enough.

Draft 6 for Eom is enough.

The prospect of a Draft 7 for Eom is just too much for me to handle.

I REALLY CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

bandages off?

2009-08-07T00:28:00.002+08:00

I finally got rid of my bandages for my ankle.

And I sincerely hope that I will not get it back again.

It's been a bad day yesterday. I keep offending people left and right due to my insensitiveness. Sorry meng fei and charmaine, I reaklly didn't meant to do all those things that upset you all. Seriously very very sorry...

pw, chem lecture test, cll test and maths assignment

2009-08-02T08:31:00.002+08:00

I started humming 'Close to You' when I was doing WR chapter two.

And I have no idea why, because certainly I don't want to be 'Close to You' in the case of PW.

Group: SATA's measures and WR chapter three.

Individual: EOM, Chem Lecture Test, CLL Test, Maths assignment, GP 250 word analysis and CLL remedial work.

Torn between the two big categories. Which one should I choose to do first?

If I don't do the first, I think my PW group members will come and butcher me up.

If I don't do the second, my mum will come and butcher me up.

I feel like just throwing everything aside but after careful analysis of the situation (what a painstakingly memorable phrase), I realise that I can't do that.

Because if I chose the third option, before my PW group members and my mum start to come after me, I think I will take the knife and gladly finish their job for them first.

"Well, in any case, you still have a variety of options to chose from even if you do decided to work on either of the different categories of work," this little irritating voice inside my head reminded me gleefully. "Yes, a large variety of options."

Yes, a large variety of options.

When faced with a decision, it is always good to have "a large varity of options" to choose from.

But in my case, I beg to differ.

I seriuosly don't like having a large variety of options to choose from when I'm deciding what homework to do.

Especially when I was startled by the prospect of undone homework and scrambled to get up at 5 on Sunday morning, when I discovered that I had discarded the bandages for my sprained ankle but it still hurts and when I am literally getting cold feet and feeling warm and fuzzy in my body which hints to me the possible start of a fever.

And Huilin, I really need to apologise for last night when we're discussing WR chapter three. My internet connection just went 'poof!' and following that, my computer also went 'poof!' and everything was black. I tried futilely to restart my computer again but it just would not restart. And there goes our discusssion. If you by any chance happen to see this post, please pardon me and my computer and send whatever chapter three info to me. I will continue doing it and by hook or by crook I'll try to send to yc before today ends.

Urgh.

This just totally rocks, doesn't it?

为什么呢？

2009-07-25T15:34:00.002+08:00

我的信念一直没有动摇过，而我也不希望它会有动摇的一天。

小时候，看待这个世界的想法很简单、很单纯、很美好。世界就是一个大空间，在这里，我能实现我的梦想。想哭就哭，想笑就笑，没什么烦恼。

长大后，我的视野越广，世界却越显得狭益了。不知不觉中，我发现我的梦想变得难以实现，逼近，要怎么期望每个人都能开心？要怎么期望人心没有贪欲？

这根本是不可能办到的事。

“世界太小，梦想太大

人生不过是残酷的笑话。”

——JS

我想我开始理解这句话的意思了。

但愿我的信念能有坚持下去的一天。

what else can I say?

2009-07-25T00:14:00.002+08:00

I serously don't like myself to be so accident-prone.

Tuesday: Scraped my knees playing netball during PE. Discover a big hole only after I got home.

Same day: Burnt myself with hot water when carrying instant noodles down from second storey.

Wednesday: Banged into my house's door when I was opening them.

Thursday: Nothing happens :) (maybe paper cuts? Or else what could have explained the few little slits on my fingers?)

Friday: Scraped my fingers on the College's walls.

Same day: Banged into a trees when walking to Serene Centre.

有些人，就算你已经很小心了，意外也仍会找上你。

很悲哀的，在过去一个星期里，我的际遇彻彻底底的向我证实了，我就是这种人。

也许你看到这里会想仰天大笑，但是，我只想告诉你：

一个礼拜遇到这么多意外，不对，应该称之为倒霉事，是不好玩的，而且也很痛！

I think the most ridiculous accident should be how I scraped my fingers against the College's walls.

It was a cool evening, after Harmoc prac. MF and I were walking to the canteen gate when we saw ching man and jessica. We went to talk to them and I put my hands on the concrete walls besides the metal gates. (notice: concrete, concrete, CONCRETE! urgh!)

There was a small levelling (is that what you call it?) or some really really very short platform between college gates and the ground before it. I didn't notice. When I stepped forward, I slipped. I don't know what exactly happen then, but then a sharp piercing pain came from my right hand and it went numb for a few seconds. When I looked at my hand, it seems alright so I just heck care about it and keep on talking.

It was only when I was walking out from Gate 1 with MF did I realise that there was this tiny red dot that kept grewing bigger and bigger on my middle and fourth finger.

Oops.

I DID IT AGAIN.

I INJURED MYSELF AGAIN. :(

Worst thing is, I forgot to bring plasters. Urgh. Luckily the blood didn't dripped in front of MF.

Then at the coro bus-stop, MF and I separated and I continue walking to Serene Centre. There was a big tree on the way, a really big one with very very rough bark. Again, I din't notice. And of course, I bumped straight into it. When trying to balance myself, I absent-mindedly put out my right hand, the hand that was injured to push myself away from the tree.

That did the trick of making blood dripped down from my fingers. (Remember how I comment about the tree having very very rough bark? Now you know where I got my observations from. A painful observation, though.) Luckily for me again, the wound is not very deep and the blood flowed quite slowly and after a while it just stopped.

And so coinicdentally, on my father's cab (he came to fetch me, willingly. for the first time in don't know how many years!) there is a box of plasters which I used to bandaged my poor fingers. But that comes with a price. Because my mum is also in my father's cab. Not to mention two very tired/ sisters too. They were stunned when I held out my fingers (I tried to wash with water to make the wound not so scary). What a graduation gift for Da Jie...

发，疯了

2009-06-15T23:34:00.002+08:00

当我们读书读得快发了疯时，你会用什么样的方法来让自己得到解脱呢？

一、无厘头的大喊大叫，让人真的觉得，你发了疯。
二、静静坐在一旁，呆呆的望着讲义/课本/文件夹，然后瓦自傻笑起来，笑得人莫名其妙。当人们的目光不小心对上你时，他们都会很惊愕的发现：天呀！那女孩怎么脸上挂着这么诡异的笑容？啊，她转过来了，好骇人呀！见鬼啊！
三、直接把讲义抛弃，投奔向最靠近的沙发、床，跟此生挚爱——周公约回去。
四、一觉醒来，发现讲义还是那么多，怎么办呢？然后，叮！脑子闪现了一个好主意。马上准备好一桶水，一个打火机，然后。。。开始伟大的焚讲义计划，将讲义焚化后的灰烬参与水中搅拌，一天喝一点，到考试时期——呀！讲义全部在我脑海里了！
（注：第四点与焚符饮用的原则基本上相同，只不过，功效如何，尚无人知晓。）

基本上前三点本人都已经做到了，也足以可见，本人确实快要步入板桥医院的门口了。

神呀！救救我吧！我不想走到第四步啊！

。。。
。。。

好吧，基本上从第一行到这一行之前都属于无意义性的话，大家都可以不要去理会，现在，重点来了！今天，我将把一篇我觉得颇耐人寻味的古文放在这里，希望大家有空来欣赏，没空，也请随意。（不过，既然你会把这个post从头看到尾，就代表说你应该是有空的，对吧？）

《寒山问拾得》

稽首文殊，寒山之士；南无普贤，拾得定是。
　　
相传寒山为文殊菩萨化身，拾得为普贤菩萨化身。
　　
昔日寒山问拾得曰：世间谤我、欺我、辱我、笑我、轻我、贱我、恶我、骗我、如何处治乎？

拾得云：只是忍他、让他、由他、避他、耐他、敬他、不要理他、再待几年你且看他。
　　
寒山云：还有甚诀可以躲得？拾得云：我曾看过弥勒菩萨偈，你且听我念偈曰：

老拙穿衲袄，淡饭腹中饱，补破好遮寒，万事随缘了。
有人骂老拙，老拙只说好；有人打老拙，老拙自睡倒；
涕唾在面上，随他自干了，我也省力气，他也无烦恼，
这样波罗蜜，便是妙中宝。若知这消息，何愁道不了。
人弱心不弱，人贫道不贫，一心要修行，常在道中办，
世人爱荣华，我却不待见，名利总成空，我心无足厌，
堆金积如山，难买无常限。子贡他能言，周公有神算，
孔明大智谋，樊哙救主难，韩信功劳大，临死只一剑，
古今多少人，哪个活几千？这个逞英雄，那个做好汉，
看看两鬓白，年年容颜变，日月穿梭织，光阴如射箭，
不久病来侵，低头暗嗟叹，自想年少时，不把修行办，
得病想回头，阎王无转限，三寸气断了，那时哪个辨？
也不论是非，也不把家辨，也不争人我，也不做好汉，
骂着也不言，问着如哑汉，打着也不理，推着浑身转，
也不怕人笑，也不做脸面，儿女哭啼啼，再也不得见，
好个争名利，须把荒郊伴。我看世上人，都是精扯淡，
劝君即回头，单把修行干，做个大丈夫，一刀截两断，
跳出红火坑，做个清凉汉，悟得长生理，日月为邻伴。

注释：
寒山，唐代隐士。居浙江天台始丰县西四十公里之寒岩幽窟中，因不详其姓氏，故以“寒山”称之，又称寒山子。

拾得，唐代天台山国清寺隐僧，姓氏籍贯不详，与寒山并称于世。相传天台山的丰干禅师曾于山中赤城道侧，忽闻小儿啼哭，寻得一年约数岁的孩童，故为取名拾得，此即为拾得的来历。丰干将他带回国清寺抚养。拾得长大后，在寺中掌理食堂、香灯的事宜。

寒山常去国清寺，与拾得十分交好。拾得每每将寺中的残羹剩饭藏于竹筒中，若寒山子来时，两人便一同拿到寺外的寒岩幽窟中去。习俗相传，寒山是文殊菩萨的化身，拾得为普贤菩萨的化身。

两人在世曾留下许多诗偈，寒山、拾得的诗（尤其是寒山），具有脱俗的气韵与禅机，对于世俗名利荣华，全不措怀。不唯具有徜徉于大自然的坦荡胸怀，而且往往有警醒佛教徒的精辟之句，因此甚为后人所推重。

Harmoc concert!

2009-06-02T17:18:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was just spectacular.

Yeah, spectacular is definitely the way to describe how I felt yesterday.

Had harmoc parctice the whole morning. Honestly I was still unsure of how to blow winter sonata. The beats and rythm thing was really hard to get, I was frantically trying to count the beats in my heart but in the end I think I still failed to do so. :/ But the funny part came when we were practising the band piece Close To You. The broken umbrella part was just fabulous. I totally laughed my head out at the act and couldn't blow into my harmoc at all! Haha, Meng Fei look super duper cute!

Then we carried chairs and all the things we need to the drame centre from the music room at college side. I seriously think the drama centre should have more chairs though. It's really tiring to carry the chairs and stands plus bags all the way from the music room to drama centrem under the hot, blazing sun :( But of course, being the strong ah ma, I manage to carry three chairs all the way there without toppling over. See! The power of ah ma. This teaches you to never underestimate the strength of old folks, especially those of the grandma/great-grandma status :)

At about 12.30 like that, the seniors released us for lunch and told us that we need to change into our black attires and assemble by 12.45. Right after the announcement, Meng Fei and I, seeing that we only have 15 minutes chiong immediately to the SALT centre to bath. We only spent 5 minutes in shower. Then both of us came out of the cubicles with dripping and messy hair, even more flustered than before. If you're in the girls' toilet then, you'll see two mad people trying to cram thier heads under the 烘干机 in a desperate attempt to dry their hair(s). Meng Fei was like complaining that her hair seems to be 'chaou tah'. In the end I think we didn't really have time enough to dry our hair and tie it back properly, so we just ran back to the drama centre with unkempt appearances but we couldn't care less because we thought we're late. Then when we finally reached, the seniors greeted us with dropping jaws and someone told us that right after we left, the seniors re-announce that we only need to change into our court shoes and not the whole attire.

...

Honestly, at that moment, both of us was stunned. Our minds just went blank and I feel like banging into the walls. Man, it was just super paiseh. All around us there's only the two of us in black lah! Someone tried to comfort us and say that the fact we change so early into our attires shows our passion and enthusiasm for harmoc. But still...

In any case, the day still has to go on and eventually we began to regain enough energy to eat our lunch. Then during our lunch, I guess the most happy thing was that we saw Zhou Quan also wearing the black attire and looking equally confused when he walked up the stairs. That moment both of us just went hysterical. At last we found company and soomeone as blur as us! Then to our extreme delight, when we're almost done with our lunch, we saw yet another senior walking up the stairs in black attire. :) More company! Wahahaha!

After lunch the more serious part came. we had our last rehearsal, which is rather 惨不忍睹. Everyone's in a mess and I think a few stands/mikes/chairs were messed up. Urgh, it was quite terrible and I think we made the seniors worried a lot. However, the best part was during the harmoc song. The whole row of juniors on the right side of the stage was like just dancing around behind the curtains. And the two gays - Damian and Deddy, finaly revealed their true colours. Omg, the things they do send shudders down my spine. Seriously, I am starting to think that all cat high guys are like um, really...

Okay, today I'm just going to crap until here. Wait for Hramoc concert part 2!

Harmoc concert!

2009-05-31T21:16:00.002+08:00

Okay, I'm feeling pretty scared and excited now!

Why so?

Excited: Tomorrow's harmoc concert!

Scared: I think I'll play a lot of wrong notes especially during my section piece which I'll get lost half-way.

How how?

I think I'll have insomia today.

*Cross my fingers and hope for luck.

Oh yah, I need to practise tiptoe-ing with court shoes too :/

sick :/

2009-05-06T21:20:00.002+08:00

I couldn't believe myself to fall sick now. When I still got tonnes of uncompleted homework.

GP:
Worksheet

Maths:
Copy Meng fei's tutorial 5A
Tutorial 4B
Study for Maths assignment on fri.

CLL:
看图作文
《锦瑟/山居秋暝》作文

Bio:
Practical 7
Practical 8
Find someone to copy cell division notes.

Chem:
Bonding tutorial (II)
Alternative assignment

GSC:
安乐死summary
食物卫生summary

PW:
Evaluation of materials

Miscellaneous:
Practise harmoc
CIP activity on 9 May

And what did I do for the whole day?

I slept.

I slept at SNEC when I was waiting to go for appointments,
I slept when I reached home at 4.00pm
I slept when waiting for my turn to see the doctor.

My mum says I can be crowned as the 睡仙already.

:/

Today's experience at SNEC was quite scary. I went for another round of blood tests again. When the doctor inject the needle into my arm, I seriously thought that it was going to be last time when they just extracted two tubes of blood. I was thinking to myself, hey, two tubes only, last time you;ve also tried it before, it's okay one.

Then suddenly I felt my left arm went numbless. I turned my haed and was just in time to see that the doctor extracted the fifth tube of blood and was capping it. I was stunned like don't know what. Then my left arm went all limb and flimsy and I need to use my right am to hold my left arm in place or else it really will fell off the sponge suppporting it. The result of losing too much blood, hai.

I am really scared of what's going to happen to my eyes. The anterior uveitis thing doesn't seem to be something that can be easily cured. And it is something that will be able to develop into eye cancer, or so that's what my doctor told me.

Doom Day's coming.

2009-05-01T01:14:00.002+08:00

15 May 2009 = D-day for me.

Meet-The-Parents.

Sheesh, I was never so scared of these kind of functions before. But now I am. I wonder how my father will react when he knows that I got an 'U' for GP and 'S' for Maths (one of my supposedly better subjects )= )

GP AQ test and CLL test really took away my happiness (or whatever's left of it ever since I knew my results). Halfway through GP AQ test I forgot my counter-arguments for two points and there goes my marks. CLL test- an overall disaster. I study the wrong thing!

Urgh. I really hate this feeling of losing control of all my grades. 回想当年 - sigh.

I really must work harder.

Okay, anyway today's quite a slack day (that's if you don't count the GP test and the CLL test), Huilin didn't come today because of sore throat and Far-Ma-Ly miss her. I hope she'll get better soon!

During CT time we chose our fac heads. I was quite torn between choosing who out of the four candidates for fac head. 掌心掌背都是肉。Why must four of them (Andrea, Warren, Preston & Theodore) all run for fac heads? Sigh, I guess the saying 'Great Minds think Alike" really do apply to all four of them. Haha, anyway in the end Andrea's voted as the fac head and her partner's Warren. Actually no matter in what case 09S72 will have a 100% chance in having one of the two fac heads in our class since three out of four candidates running for fac head are in our class. Anyway, when the four candidates are all dancing the fac dance right, Charmaine and I were impressed by Qiuhan's dancing - all her steps are so well-defined and sharp (comment by Char)! But of course all the other candidates and their partners dance well too =)

After CT session we went to the computer room to find Mrs Tan for amendments to PI (urgh) again. Evelyn, Meng Fei and I stayed till quite late, we gossiped for quite a bit though =) Then later Meng Fei and I went to find Mr Poh. He's not, er, in the very exact mood to answer our questions after all the lessons (I think he seems really tired and flustered when we saw him). Haha, Meng Fei and I accidentally 'provoked' him and he threatened (?) to take off 20 marks from our lipid tests if we still keep on asking him for our results for the test. Then we a bit like "fled" from the classroom. Both of us were like laughing all the way when we went up to the Music Room to gather for the Harmoc Post-SYF Party as we thought of how we 落荒而逃 from the classroom!

Harmoc Post-SYF Party turned out to be rather nice =) I thought it'll be quite boring at first. We got to know the J1 Harmoc people better =) (I seriously think that the proportion of guys to girls in the J1 Harmoc people is really quite similar to our CLL class) I ganna the 终极密码 when we're playing the game and had to soak my foot in the pool with another CCA mate(sheesh, I forgot her name alr) as some sort of dare. Actually I thought it's more of a treat rather than a dare. The instant you dipped your foot into the cold water - it's really so 爽! Then we took a walk around our senior's condo and discover this playground-in-a-pool - isn't that cool? Meng Fei and I were really tempted to take off our shoes and socks and to wade in the water, but we didn't dare because we haven't really sought permission from our senior beforehand. Anyway we're also not too sure how deep the water is. Such a pity! Haha, but anyway in the end we still manage to play at the slide in the conventional playground found at our senior's condo too. Both of us really fit the description of 童心未泯 =D

I went home at about 9.20 pm and it still took me one and a half hours to reached home. I was really tired then, slept on MRT for the whole journey from Choa Chu Kang to Toa Payoh.

Sigh, tommorow (or rather, TODAY) will have to chiong all the homework. One thing I realise every since secondary school days - long weekends are never long. In fact, it's always shorter as teachers will always happily give more homework to us, Either that, or you'll find that you have a lot of homework to catch up on. (A perfect example: GSC summaries. CLL essays.)

Hey GSC people please remember to do your *人口老化/优雅社会/器官移植/安乐死 summaries and hand up by Monday can? Got a lot of people still haven't pass up these summaries to me leh! Thanks and let's hope that we'll have a nice weekend.

*Delete where appropriate.

...

2009-04-24T21:49:00.002+08:00

What kind of trouble did I get myself into?

2 chinese compos (mon)
2 gsc summaries (mon)
1 supposed-to-hand-in-yet-still-cannot-be-explained-why-still-on-my-table PI (mon)
1 bio DNA tutorial (tues)
2 sets of bio notes to copy (mon)
1 chem bonding 2 tutorial (thurs)
1 chem lecture test (mon)
1 cll test (thurs)
1 don't-know-pop-out-from-where cip activity

Sayonara LXY, I can't see any hope for you :(

Grandchildren/great-grandchild, 阿嬷先走一步了。Take care of yourselves, 阿嬷'll miss you all.

directions from my dreams

You're Beautiful MVs

猫咪，你在等谁？

容易高兴 容易伤心

“人来疯”内心剖解

PW'S OVER

记者日记

咬牙切齿

诡异的灾害

after promos...

what the heck is happening to me?

just sick?!

to go or not to go?

pasta anyone?

confessions to make

eom madness?

bandages off?

pw, chem lecture test, cll test and maths assignment

为什么呢？

what else can I say?

发，疯了

Harmoc concert!

Harmoc concert!

sick :/

Doom Day's coming.

...

容易高兴容易伤心